A Noir Celebration
by sara t.
What if there was no rainbow at the end of the tunnel
What if instead there was only a slow narrowing
Moving away from light into smoky grey
A kind of sucking darkness into
A kind of noir celebration of despair
Complete with an exploding champagne bottle
Of golden tears and a warm terrible enveloping
Which seems oh I don't know
………comforting in a way-
like a heavy coat or a hiding place
Horribly inviting as the light dims
What if I walked towards the end of the tunnel
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Great to read more of your work, Sara.
Enjoyed the dark imagery of this piece. Really like how the voice breaks in this piece -
"Which seems oh I don't know
………comforting in a way-
like a heavy coat or a hiding place"
This is good. If I might so bold as to suggest something, take a look at the last two lines. This seems to end just right for me with "like a heavy coat or a hiding place." Pardon my candor, but I remember you saying you'd rather have all thoughts shared about your work, and that's something I also prefer.
Thanks Sam...Sheldon i DO appreciate candor, thanks for your suggestion.