by Jerry Ratch
No, You're an Old Joke!
> > Subject: Useless, but interesting FACTS
1. If you yelled for 8 years, 7 months and 6 days you would have produced enough sound energy to heat one cup of coffee. (Hardly seems worth it.)
> > 2. If you farted consistently for 6 years and 9 months, enough gas is produced to create the energy of an atomic bomb. (Now that's more like it!)
> > 3. The human heart creates enough pressure when it pumps out to the body to squirt blood 30 feet. (O.M.G.!)
> > 4. A pig's orgasm lasts 30 minutes.
> > (In my next life, I want to be a pig.)
> > 5. A cockroach will live nine days without its head before it starves to death.
> > (Creepy.)
> > (I'm still not over the pig.)
> > 6. Banging your head against a wall uses 150 calories an hour.
> > (Do not try this at home...... maybe at work.)
> > 7. The male praying mantis cannot copulate while its head is attached to its body. The female initiates sex by ripping the male's head off.
> > ("Honey, I'm home. What the....?!")
> > 8. The flea can jump 350 times its body length. It's like a human jumping the length of a football field.
> > (30 minutes... lucky pig... can you imagine??)
> > 9. The catfish has over 27,000 taste buds.
> > (What could be so tasty on the bottom of a pond?)
> > 10. Some lions mate over 50 times a day.
> > (I still want to be a pig in my next life...quality over quantity)
> > 11. Butterflies taste with their feet.
> > (Something I always wanted to know.)
> > 12. The strongest muscle in the body is the tongue.
> > (Hmmmmmm........)
> > 13. Right-handed people live, on average, nine years longer than left-handed people.
> > (If you're ambidextrous, do you split the difference?)
> > 14. Elephants are the only animals that cannot jump.
> > (OK, so that would be a good thing....)
> > 15. A cat's urine glows under a black light.
> > (I wonder who was paid to figure that out?)
> > 16. An ostrich's eye is bigger than its brain.
> > (I know some people like that.)
> > 17. Starfish have no brains.
> > (I know some people like that too.)
> > 18. Polar bears are left-handed.
> > (If they switch, they'll live a lot longer.)
> > 19. Humans and dolphins are the only species that have sex for pleasure.
> > (What about that pig??)
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old jokes, from a rediscovered email