Stalling
by Andrew Roe
My son, six, is practicing dying. It's something he's started doing at bedtime, part of the nightly wind-down routine, when I read him books and he stalls because he doesn't want to go to sleep yet. So he pretends he's dying.
Lately I've been telling him about my father, who died two months before he was born. And along with telling him about my father, his grandfather, there have been the usual tricky questions about death: What happens to our bodies when we die? Where do we go? Do we know we're dead? Is it just like sleeping?
"Watch," he instructs me, gently lying himself down in his bed and flattening his arms against his sides, corpselike. "No, wait—now. Watch me now. See if you can see me breathing."
He holds his breath for as long as he can, about fifteen seconds, though it seems longer, his chest remaining flat and still, and he looks dead, enough so that it makes me hold my breath. Then his breathing returns in one big exhale and he coughs and it's over and he's asking more questions, stalling:
"What was I like when I was a baby?"
"What were you like when you were a baby, Daddy?"
"What was Mommy like when she was a baby?"
"What was Grandpa Ron like?"
I answer the questions. The last one is hard, though, even after all these years. I tell my son that his grandfather loved him very much, that he liked tennis, that he was funny and liked to joke, and that we're all very sad he's not here.
"We're sad?" my son asks.
"Yeah, we're sad," I tell him. "But it's okay to be sad. We just miss him."
He rolls over on his side, like he might finally be ready to sleep.
"I miss him too," he says.
He breathes and closes his eyes. I hold my breath again. He doesn't move.
When I want to write a great of flash, Andrew, I will take "Stalling" out and look at it; study it. Thank you for the awesome model. Not a wasted word; every moment was real.
excellent details and dialogue -- you've made the narrator's anxiety palpable and his observations felt very real, true, tender.
Beautiful focus on one of those parent/child moments that are so importantly urgent yet seem to happen without our control. Nice work.
Hi Dan, Julie and Susan -- thanks so much for reading and commenting. Greatly appreciated!
Great sense of relationship in this piece, and the writing is strong. The form makes this a solid read.
good work, here--
Glad you posted this one. So good.
Sam, Gary and David -- thank you!
I really enjoyed reading this piece. It felt like I was there. Good Job.
Wow, that was like a sharp, clean jab. Fantastic writing.
Oh, wow. Good stuff.
Drew, Ajay, Katrina -- thanks so much!
Simplicity and breadth, just right.
wow, very sharp and beautiful. Good job!
This is a great one. Every aspect of it is powerful and not a word is wasted. All of us that have kids can definitely relate to it. If you don’t have kids, I imagine it’s powerful enough to get to you as well.
you know i love this piece. so much.
Thanks all. Extra big thanks to Meg.
In a word: Bountiful. Just lovely.
Really nice and surprisingly powerful in such a concise space.
Thanks Marcelle and Gina! Much appreciated.
I'm so glad Christian Bell called my attention to this in the latest edition of Faves. It captures the way a child thinks and a parent reacts perfectly--the language so precise. Really wonderful.
Thank you, Jane! I appreciate the note.
Well done, Andrew. A polished, moving piece.
Wonderful relationship between father and son, the dialogue spot on, the wonderful triangulation between recently deceased father, newish father in the middle, and young son practicing dying. Simple, direct, emotional without undue sentimentality.
Deft is the word that comes to mind. Skillful and moving. Wonderful little story. *