“Yes, you are.”
“I'm not.” Her head flies off in anger, zooming across the room, getting smaller optically as it goes. Then, it jolts back, flying onto her neck, but overshooting, not attached in alignment with it. Off-center. It hasn't regained its regular size.
“Yes, you are.”
I leave her to believe what she wants, and I resurface the table some more, giving it an antique look by hitting it with chains, before I put on a new coat of color that makes it old.
“Do it to me,” she says.
“What?”
“Do it.”
So, I rough her up with sand paper, and hit her with chains, making dents. She examines her surfaces, tidily and efficiently, indicating the spots most in need of filling in with scratches and scrapes.
“You died too young. You were so beautiful.”
“You're welcome,” she says. She turns her head and blushes. I can tell she doesn't want to agree to her dead status, but can't turn down the gratitude.
“Do you want some cherry varnish?”
“That would be very pretty.”
She looks so natural in deep red. It makes it hard for her to move, but she's pretty stiff anyway. “I miss you,” she says.
I cry. She doesn't. She's blowing on her surfaces, and unfortunately, blows out her dentures, which stick in the varnish just as it's setting. Now, her teeth are stuck to her right shoulder. “You're still the best, Mama. The very best.”
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Whenever I dream of my Mama I become lucid, as I know she is dead. But she doesn't always agree with me. I've finally stopped trying to convince her. This poem comes out of that.
For awhile, she did some antiquing, and did a piece of furniture at Papa's company. Watching her hit it with chains, next to where his gorgeous secretary, made an impression on my young mind.
Though I think I was a good daughter, I never get over wishing I could spend more loving time with her, apologize for not getting there earlier at the end, and basically antiquing the topic to death. I have such intense love for her, my current collection is coming out of that. This story, however, was in my last one, Collapsible Horizon, which came out of being there for my father for the last year of his life. (I wasn't going to make THAT mistake again.)
Published in Between Altered States
wow. great!
Fantastic. You did this style so well!
I keep re-reading this, just to get to the “Do you want some cherry varnish?” line.
Simply love it.
I understand what you mean about becoming lucid; the same thing happens when I dream about my dad.
I like:
"I rough her up with sand paper, and hit her with chains, making dents. She examines her surfaces, tidily and efficiently, indicating the spots most in need of filling in with scratches and scrapes."
-- which feels to me like it has a deeper thought under the surface.
Unreal and good that way.
I'm having trouble with the line that she died too young and beautiful and equating it with someone who wears dentures at the close. Old people wear dentures, unless they're exceptionally poor. The rest is clever and extremely interesting.
Thank you for your comment, JP Reese. People can wear dentures in late middle age, and that can be too young to die, and can still be beautiful, especially to the eyes of a daughter. I can see how it would seem odd, though.
Strong story, Tantra. I like this piece. Good character study.
I did not find dying too young at odds with dentures. I think the people we love always die too young.