The Dotards

by stephen hastings-king

In my dream, as in life, I could not play guitar. So I gathered another who could neither play guitar nor sing with another who could not play bass and yet another who could not play drums and together we formed a band. Yes that again. The band was called The Dotards. We played synthetic derivative punk. We used Donald Trump tweets as lyrics. 

Then we hit the road. Because it was a dream, that was easy. First we were a novelty. Then we were a hit. We were becoming vaguely competent. We played big venues. We made some serious bank. 

When we were on teevee we knew we had gone too far. We told ourselves that we should stop. 

But it was too late. We were addicted to being the Dotards, the synthetic derivative punk band that used Donald Trump tweets as lyrics. It defined everything about each of us.  And it never, ever stopped. It was horrifying.