John Doe's Jeans
How the fuck did they expect me to get home from the hospital? Pumped full of morphine, a cast on one arm, bandaged like a damned mummy. They cut all my clothes off so I'm down to a hospital gown and my shoes. In the panic following news of my motorcycle crash, my honey fled the house without coat or wallet, rode in the ambulance with me, and now, nearly midnight, we don't even have cab fare home.
While an orderly vanishes to find me “something to wear,” Cassie goes searching for a telephone. She comes back looking as wiped out as me. “None of our friends were around. I called Judith. She said she'll pick us up.”
Judith. My ex-wife. Part of the reason she was “ex” was her insistence that I couldn't have a motorcycle. I could see her expression now. Fuck.
The orderly appears, with a tan work shirt and a faded pair of jeans in my size. Cassie dresses me. The jeans are perfectly worn in, surprisingly comfortable. It occurs to me to ask, where did these come from?
He shrugs. “Fatal crashes. Homicides. Homeless guys. Whatever. They go to the morgue, no one ever asks for the clothes back. Comes in handy at times like this.”
Cassie braces me as I limp toward the entrance, wearing some dead guy's clothes. Judith is waiting by the door, trying not to look I-told-you-so. She's been crying. Suddenly I am too. Fuck.
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Author's Note
Written for a short-short (250 words) contest, but not submitted. Based on a real incident.
I liked the writing and the sentiments particularly expressive punctuation with Fuck: good usage in my book.
I know that some people bristle at the use of the word, but it's one of my favorites. When I made a living as an ironworker, I learned dozens of ways to use "Fuck" and variations thereof, such as "Effen, "Effen A," "Freakin'," etc. It's a living, breathing word that can, under certain circumstances in usage, express the unexpressable. So I agree with David. Perfect usage and placement.
Yes, the F-word has its own vocabulary full of different connotations and shadings, which I learned working will all male crews. Well-used here. I particularly like the ending. *
I agree with everyone else--good usage of the f-word. It comes in at just the right places. Beyond that, this is solid writing. Compelling with a nice sense of voice.
Really good. What a perfect, telling detail, him, all dressed up in a dead man's clothes. *
Good story. Great selection of detail. Deft ending. Just plain good writing--damn good.
The voice is great, details wonderful, all very real.