The Option Package

by Larry Strattner

He was telling me today he felt like ranting about cars.

It totally baffles him why, when buying a car, to get an automobile safety package which includes many good things to support  his ongoing health and welfare, he must also buy a moon roof and stereo system which will do nothing other than give him a head cold and an ear ache.

In a land with so many automobile deaths every year it would demonstrate some elevated sense of moral responsibility to allow those desiring to buy a car packed with safety features to do so, and those who desire a car packed with stereo equipment  to do the same. No one's rights need be impinged upon, just let the people who desire protection from assholes driving down the highway with their heads stuck up through the moon roof with the stereo blasting, buy as much protection as they wish without tacking an automatic ass wiping system onto the four point seat belt option.

Coupling unrelated items into packages requiring the purchase of all as a prerequisite for the purchase of one is irresponsible, but of course so are automobile manufacturers and most drivers. “We get what we deserve,” he said, “and it must be a stereo moon roof.”