Grounded
by Johnsienoel
Rooted in my misery on fertile fields of pain,
daily I take note of you; you too, I see are lame.
Crippled be both you and I, you fiercely brave the day
and I do covet yet in vain your wings to fly away.
No temporary solace upon this patch of earth,
stymied in your injury; labored by your girth.
Wearied soul you gaze about come sun or wind or rain.
Your roost beholds a tragic vice, the world of human stain.
Do you sense our suffering, the way that I feel yours?
Abandoned and alone reluctant is our course.
Did you mate for life; eternal thought thy mate,
then lies untold, a broken heart, grounded you in hate?
Did he leave you broken thought never to recover?
Daunted by the baggage did he leave you for another?
Another day of waking, another day of rain,
we amble on in stoic form, we limp about the pain.
Would I could rescue you, in yours I see my plight.
Alas I see you need me not for you have taken flight.
“Don't go, don't go, don't go,” I say,
“you're crippled, can't you see?”
Suffering has not rooted you, but eternally grounded me.
Come back...
Come back...
Come back to me. Do I hear your call?
A momentary listening…
deafening silence that is all.
Broken and alone, struggling to survive,
My weary soul tries to soar, taking wing with you beside.
Sufferings never ended. Lessons rarely learned.
Unlike you I cannot fly and navigate my world.
published in The Shine Journal
This a good work. I especially like "No temporary solace upon this patch of earth,stymied in your injury;labored by your girth". And also, "suffering has not rooted you, but eternally grounded me"
Such a brooding piece. The structure and formal language really add to the somber tone here. So many dark and wonderful points in this piece. “Your roost beholds a tragic vice, the world of human stain” is the crux here – and connects perfectly with the conclusion … the absence of flight … which brings out the dreadful aspect of life … “my misery on fertile fields of pain”. Grounded. What makes this all the more impacting for me is the tragic view placed against a natural backdrop. The piece does such a good job in expressing this. Near the end, the broken pattern of couplets is a strong move – adding to the frustration of the inability to break away – falls back into the two-line form. I like this piece a lot, Jennifer.
Excellent, and it doesn't let up until it needs to let go. This is finely tuned and a joy to read.Thank you.
very nice. I love the pleading of it. don't go, don't go, don't go.
Thanks, everyone!
Sam & Herbert - I love how you plug into the emotions of this piece...brooding/pleading/futile - the paradox of life: beautiful yet jaded.
back from my daily walk in the woods to find your comments on my Poetipedia - thank you. The geese I came upon were quite well, as were the deer, ground creatures and heron - often I have asked myself myriad unsaid questions to the creatures I encounter, you express them sublimely, make the connection. The hectoring of the questions echoes their call. You belie yourself, intentionally I think, in the final couplet by composing this ode to commonality of emotion, thereby transcending the 'Sufferings never ended', the 'Lessons rarely learned'.
You 'fly and navigate' the world of poetry quite well indeed.
Excellant, I will return.