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My Words


by Darryl Price


I wanted to know, but the subject was
something I seem to have lost. That feeling
never found. You never even waved a 
goodbye when you had the chance, to make it
uncomplicated I mean, I don't care. 

I wanted to see, but the one thing I 
wanted to say to you was like having 
the direct sun in my face. Those lonely
ashes made such a fool out of me. Could
have said goodbye, instead you took my words 

away. I wanted to feel something real,
but it was hard enough to inhale and
exhale without losing balance. Sometimes 
that's all that can be said about a wind
full of disillusions. I wanted to 

be somewhere besides stuck in between the
roaring mountain and the vast silent seas  
with you. I wanted to sing, the tune came 
out so slowly, like a leaf unfurling 
over time you didn't have; I couldn't 

stop its inevitable souvenir 
from arriving too late to keep you from
driving in a deep black car with a dream 
diver at the wheel. The poem scraped up 
the fallen pieces and blew them into
 
floating curtains again, into the high 
dense grasses. Little kites, now asleep, all 
alone. I wanted to think I could wait 
for something more than sadness, but darkness
was the only kindness for many years.

All my love letters are still there being written. 
I wanted to carry on, and to lead myself
to the better days ahead. Lover, that 
turning around wave would have meant so much  
to my state of mind. Your tide has left me  

and here I'll stay. I wanted to make more 
than just shadows on the wall, but others
seem satisfied with this captured outcome 
of our story. I wanted to let you 
own their truth, if you want it, but now I 

have made a grape out of you doing it 
that way for them; love's battleground surely 
must be blessed: I'll be there with you when you 
decide to believe in it. Draw your laugh 
and be strong. Turn around and look. Don't keep 

them waiting. Don't want to wonder any 
longer, but all I've got is something so 
unconditional, somewhere in the whole 
unconventional stars above. See, it 
wasn't the moon. I'm grateful for some light.  
 

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