55 words #4
by Bobbi Lurie
If only I could decipher the mightiness of the sword and put it into pen, I might free myself. But then again, I sought this duration of loss. I wrapped a fabric of lace around my body, stood stiffly at the garden party and asked to be captured.
(I drink with my thinking problem intact.)
|
8
favs |
1898 views
10 comments |
55 words
All rights reserved. |
Author's Note
55 words
Other stories by Bobbi Lurie
Tags
Groups
-
55 Word Stories
Public group69 members
Comments
You must
log in
to post comments.
This may be my favorite in the series so far. The little parenthetical remark at the end sets the first line spinning like a coin! *
That parenthetical remark feels like a koan. ^
so much said in so few words
fave
You are nailing this form in a grand way, Bobbi. Great way to close this piece. James is dead on with the koan-feel at the end.
I read with my thinking problem intact. Yet your visual details outline a number of intriguing story lines, made more intriguing by the parenthetical aside at the end. Inventive use of the form. Why the bold type?
Wow. This is wonderful.
yep, a koan at the end. very powerful structure, and the content none too shabby either ;^) i am very much liking these 55 worders of yours. peace *
Love this, Bobbie!!! Love these 55 word excursions!!! ****
Another fine 55-word entry, Bobbi!
Great ending!