You've still got hours left to write it.
Taking quirky, humorous prose, poetry, comics, and if you can think of anything else, probably that too.
(You'll be in good company with award-winning international authors, Pushcart nominees, editors, engineers, teachers, geniuses. No philatelists or numismatists, though. At least not yet.)
Of course, if submitting to a charitable endeavor embarrasses you, we can certainly attribute your generous work to a pen name. I happen to have several name generators handy.
Perhaps we can call you by your pirate name, "Calico" Jim Scabb. Or your gangsta name, the always popular Heavy Forty Sippa. Personally, I plan to submit with my vampire name, Lady Antonia the Chicken Sucker.
So don't be frightened, El Gato Misterio, we can protect your identity.
Should I add that we have work from Tom Kennedy (http://www.thomasekennedy.com/AboutAuthor/AuthorIntro.aspx), Maria Gillan (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Maria_Mazziotti_Gillan) and Brian White, editor of Fireside Magazine (http://firesidemag.com/) in this anthology? No, no need.
Maybe, just maybe, the problem is inspiration. The topics are New Jersey and/or disaster. Perhaps you have no ideas left. Here are some:
Your dog is flatulent during the most important dinner party of your life.
The New Jersey Devil is neither from New Jersey, nor a devil. Discuss.
A beautiful collie dog discovers you've fallen in a well. She goes to get help, but her Jersey accent is so thick, everyone thinks you're lost in Atlantic City.
Donald Trump's hair develops sentience and schemes to take over the world.
The Mayan Apocalypse happened, but no one noticed because we were all posting photos of our cats/broken toes/dinner on Facebook.
Or more:
Your husband has invited the new boss home for dinner and you realize he's the guy you had that one night stand with last week.
You got really drunk and stumbled on some great revelation, which you wrote down. Something that could save the world, which is on the very brink of destruction. But them you sobered up and can't find the notebook where you wrote it. Meanwhile, aliens have been watching you, the very aliens that intend to blow us to smithereens. They snatched your revelations. You have just hours to build a spaceship from empty liquor bottles, household appliances, and styrofoam, and blast off to doc with the alien ship to reclaim your notebook, take it to Washington DC, find a non-partisan receptive ear, and save the world.
Or you posted on a forum and have no way to delete the rambling and irritating post you, well, posted. Talk about disaster.
Just wondering...
I sent you a little sumpin' right after subs opened. (As my life is a disaster, I had something already prepared). Never got a confirmation if it was received.
Did ya get it? If not, be happy to resend.
"...find a nonpartisan receptive ear..."? Bwaaaahahahahahahaha...urp, ooops...choke...helllp!
Sally, I don't seem to see it. Did you send it through https://ohsandy.submittable.com/submit ?
Would you mind resubmitting? You should get an auto-confirmation. Sorry for the hassle, and thank you for sending something in!
Just resent successfully. Don't know what happened. I AM a disaster.
Thanks for prompting me to check!
I have trouble being funny and get in trouble when I try, so I'll have to pass. Otherwise, I'm a sucker for these things.
Sally, I've got it. Thanks!
Clock is ticking down.
I scraped mine in, just under the wire.
Did you get enough, Lynn?