I Confess to God in the Shower


During fifth grade, I was called
closeted queer and tall faggot.

I still live at home
but I've paid for many apartments

so homeless boys would bend me over,
call me “Lover” or “Handsome.”

With all that rent, I could move out,
but without them I'd rather die in the street. 

People laugh at me during parties,
ask to touch my beard. Make it a game. 

I ask men to spit on me. 
Hegel said: The subject must realize itself. 

The Bible tells me I was made from dust. 
I am who I am when I am filth.