Urban Skunks
by Steven Gowin
When you walk dogs at night, watch out for urban skunks.
For urban skunks want to visit your neighborhood and want to be bold in your neighborhood. They want to walk right up to you and dare you to threaten them so they can spin around and squirt you a measure of skunk juice.
But stupid dogs, like my dogs, the ugly one and the simple one, do not distinguish a kitty hiding under a car from an urban skunk. They only want to chase small animals. They do not care about what skunks can do to them; the chasing instinct has broken their smellers. But I do not hate Skunks.
A skunk has soul and will root out a bastard rat and eat its rat pups. Sometimes I see a rat when I walk dogs at night. Rats are filthy, and their teeth never stop growing. So I want a skunk over a rat any day. Go skunks! Kill rats; kill their wives and rat children, and stuff what you can not eat down their rat holes for their cannibal brethren. Then go kill more of the bastards.
When you walk dogs at night, watch out for urban skunks but do not fear them. Urban skunks are our friends.
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Author's Note
The Bible doesn't say anything about skunks as far as I can tell.
It talks about clean and unclean meat. I would think the poor skunk would be "unclean," although I do not believe it has cloven hoofs.
"You shall not eat any of their flesh, and you shall not touch their carcasses; they are unclean to you." Leviticus 11: 8
In Latin, skunk is "mephista, mephista," which translates to noxious vapors, noxious vapors... for real.
Other stories by Steven Gowin
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this is interesting and quite well written. So I favorited it. But I do have to tell you that I have a pet rat and am heartily offended. My pet rat's name is Lucy.
Well, she's not a sewer rat... Thanks for the fave Meg. Damn seems like that would have been something you'd have told me. Now I'm doing the walk of shame, although I am still no fan of rats.
excellent. we have both avocado rats and skunks. possums and snakes to boot. cheers!
I always smile when I read your stories. I will take a skunk over a raccoon anyday. Peace *