How strangely things feel. Today was lovely and warm, the light November soft, people were out and seemed happy unless they didn't, the restaurants full, Plague Time still upon us, the aggregate numbers keep increasing, Massachusetts just changed its daily data release, now they're about granular testing data, worries about hospital capacities have subsided so the state now tracks it by region rather than by the older census of individual hospitals, even as the daily hospital census was the only day-to-day indicator of how things might stand where any given in-state user lives, these format changes have thrown users into a more aggregate-dependent understanding of Plague Time than has been the case since April, aggregate increase numbers are a vice that is tightening except, unlike most vices that tighten, but you don't know where it is tightening, except on Thursdays, when the state's city/town data lets you know where it had been tightening the previous week----(if you're lucky) Plague Time is mostly a data-effect: today that effect permeated the interpretation of what I was seeing as I drove past, doing errands that were primarily about needing olives for a martini to celebrate the it's finally over, knowing, for example, that the dead weight of third-way neoliberalism is still upon us, but, I had decided, at approximately 11:27 this morning, to say fuck it, I'll think about that tomorrow, along with the vexing problem of how is it possible that 70.5 million voted for Trump, knowing what we know of him in 2020, but today, I decided, in a similar vein, at approximately 11:27 this morning, that I'm just going to go with the fact that several million more did not vote for him and that now, save for the lame duck and the narcissistic injury that will give it such flight as it might have in the end, it's over. It's over. And, for the time being, that's enough.
Nonetheless, I keep thinking: The past four years. What the fuck was that?
Outside was lovely and warm, the light soft, people were out, the restaurants were full, Plague Time a barrier, a sense reinforced by driving around in a car, doing errands that were primarily about needing olives for a martini to celebrate the end of whatever that was that just happened, so that the collective experience of electoral victory that I would have preferred was everywhere mediated by being-in-a-car, except for the minute it took to pass a celebration in Newburyport, downtown by a traffic light, on a day of particularly slow traffic because it was there-won't-be-many-afternoons-like-this-until-spring crowded, traffic was at a crawl, we ended up stopped in front of a celebration of maybe 20 people, Biden/Harris swag and drums, passing car-horns honking. and it was poignant, as celebrations go, everybody separated by masks and windows and Plague Time, but the situation of being stranded at a red light in front of them nonetheless came with a sense of solidarity that was also a reminder that Plague Time presented Donald Trump an imperative to govern, which he had no idea how to do---so while Plague Time may have reduced solidarity to sightlines and recognitions at a traffic light that expressed itself as horn honks and maybe tears, it was also a fundamental condition of possibility for our being able, finally, to rid ourselves of him.
Later, at home, on the internet, I assemble fragments of street celebrations from cities one coast to the other. I watch them and listen in the compressed fidelity of computer speakers. How strangely things feel.
Our tour of the northeast quadrant of Massachusetts revealed that, while some Trump 2020 swag remains (flags, large signs on buildings, smaller ones on lawns), much has come down, including a particularly obnoxious assemblage on Route 1 at Linebrook Road that was, a week ago, comprised of dozens of signs (God and Guns and Blood and Soil, Jesus 2020, No More Bullshit, Fuck Your Feelings, etc.). Only one sign remains (Jesus 2020). Where the blood and soil billboard was is now an American flag. But the mega-swag display at a Salisbury construction company is still up. Even though the place was obviously closed, I flipped it off as I passed. I'm guess I'm not over whatever just happened. What I'm sure of is that I'm really, really tired. I don't know why. I'll think about it tomorrow.
4
favs |
628 views
7 comments |
772 words
All rights reserved. |
From the Contagion project.
I live in a small coastal Massachusetts town among other coastal Massachusetts towns. Yesteday I had errands to run.
I would have preferred to be in a city, Philadelphia in particular. I like to think I would have gone to Four Seasons Total Landscaping for Guiliani's press conference that reporters were walking away from at 11:27 AM when AP called the election, as he was laying out Team Trump's strategy for overriding the electorate in the courts, and a reporter told him the game was over. If you haven't been on Twitter to look at things related to Four Seasons Total Landscaping, please remedy that situation forthwith.
Anyway, I wasn't in Philadelphia. I was in this other place and I tried to write something about it. I am still strangely tired.
This story has no tags.
A real part of this moment, whatever it may be, is registering what happened and how it felt. That especially includes the phenomenology of time: how Plague Time, a maybe singular kind of time, feels. As all time is, a chancy bird to catch on the wing; I think you succeeded here.
*
Thanks much for the reads.
I think the project would feel seen by your comment, David, if the project were in such a situation. That pleases me. It's been a long labor.
Pretty much describes it all. Still waiting for the seeds of sanity to fall--to soon to tell what the roots will look like. *
Everything now feels like a report from the front lines, and this has that feel.
Captured it!
Thanks much for the reads and comments.
It took every ounce of self-control I possessed to not write about Four Seasons Total Landscaping and content myself with a t-shirt, that just arrived Thursday in all its Gritty glory.
Sanity has been delayed.