Intractable

He felt a cold, hard surface beneath him as he laid on his back in total darkness, trying to remember who he was, while realizing where he was with nightmarish certainty. His sense of time had dissolved into an ocean of timeless drifting. Still, with his last thread of self consciousness, he held to the belief he could endure anything if he remain rooted in his soul. It's the very reason for which he was institutionalized and isolated after drug and shock treatments failed.

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Author's Note

It's about mental illness and trauma.

Inspired by Nietzsche's 'Human, All Too Human:'

"An idealist is incorrigible: if he is thrown out of his heaven he makes an ideal of his hell. Let him be disillusioned and behold!—he will embrace this disillusionment just as fervently as a little while before he embraced his hopes. Insofar as his tendency is among the great incurable tendencies of human nature he is able to give rise to tragic destinies and afterwards become the subject of tragedies: for tragedies have to do with precisely what is incurable, ineluctable, inescapable in the fate and character of man."

Also by Thomas Mann's portraial of Joseph in 'Joseph and His Brothers.'