Indulgence
I crave the confines of the convent.
My heart and mind the only victims
Of my heart and mind.
Vows made to One
Used to unfaithfulness;
Jealous but just to forgive.
I should have been a nun.
Cloistered away from approval,
or lack thereof.
Love filtered and focused,
Devoted to duty,
Finding meaning in the menial.
I would practice mortification.
A terrestrial purgatory
For soul and body.
Seeking absolution,
Enraptured by salvation,
Venerating the Venerable for all time.
I long for sanctuary.
Some dispensation from the Church
That allows protestants instead of proselytes
To seek asylum.
Barred from aspirancy,
There will be no hiding amongst the Holy.
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Author's Note
Inspired by my recent readings of "Mariette in Ecstasy" by Ron Hansen and "The Sparrow" by Mary Doria Russell. Not Catholic, but I studied the Church at a Catholic university as a matter of course; she's intrigued me ever since.
Other stories by Emily Sparkles
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Ms Russell was raised both Catholic and in a military family, an extra measure of abnormally invasive intellectual influence.
I like this measure of contemplative life from the outside in. Many people would find the life attractive.
***
I would practice mortification.
A terrestrial purgatory
For soul and body.
Seeking absolution,
Enraptured by salvation,
Venerating the Venerable for all time.
*Oh, how I get this.
lovely
thoughtful
*
"Love filtered and focused." Oh yea, the toughest of them all, I reckon. The monk's life has tempted me a time or two, too. But that damn "filtered and focused" part would drive me crazier. *
Thanks, all, for the feedback.
James - I will take any and all info on Russell. She is one of many I aspire to be like.
Mathew - I think it'd do the same for me, in the end. :)
First rate sounds in this.
Fond of both novels you mention in your Author's Note (have often taught both). Effective springboards for your poem--not that your piece doesn't stand very nicely alone. Ah, how desirable to be: "Cloistered away from approval,/or lack thereof."If only.
Thanks, Gary.
Ed - where do you teach? I envy your students. Also - a heartfelt thank you for your feedback.
As a young man, I read Thomas Merton and nikos Kazantzakis and felt the pull of the monastic life--what an ill fit it would have been, but I understand the pull. well put.*
Yes, the idea of a monastic life can be appealing, the realities might not be. Nicely wrought verse. Me, I prefer solitude, I don't need hourly reminders of my religious duties.*
Gary and Daniel - Solidarity through the pull; solidarity through solitude instead. Thanks for reading and commenting and *. Much appreciated :)
I don't really have much to add here. In the main it's well handled, and avoids the kind of pontificating narcissism most others would apply to the subject. It's a very good poem. I'm not sure that you need the 'just' at the end of the 1st stanza, however, and I'd be inclined to add one more line at the end.
Good constructive feedback. Thank you!