by Con Chapman
Where does the foam from the lattes go?
I'm not being flip--I want to know.
When I don't say “no foam” at the espresso bar
It sticks to the side of my cup, like tar.
The only way to remove it, without being a messer
Is to use those sticks that look like tongue depressors.
Does foam evaporate, compounding global warming?
Is there an endangered species downstream that it's harming?
Don't like the way foam tickles your nose?
Order it “flat,” but do it in prose.
There's no surer way to get knocked on your keister
Than to anger a tattooed Goth pierced-nose barista.
From "The Girl With the Cullender on Her Head and Other Wayward Women." Drawing by Sage Stossel
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I think the word is barister.
Or is it keista?
When they write my obit I want to be remembered for that rhyme.
"Don't like the way foam tickles your nose?
Order it “flat,” but do it in prose."
Yes. Yes. Yes.