The Poor Little
by Laurel Snyder
Wow. I'm just going to say it--
That's one ugly little girl you've
Made for yourself. But now someone
Will miss you when you're dead.
No energy is every truly wasted.
But nobody needs to
Look that much like a potato.
No, no, I don't think I want to hold her.
Should I tell you she looks like
you? Or that she doesn't? That she
takes after her mom, who also
resembles a tuber? I'm sorry, but.
Genes are cruel, will continue
To be cruel. That's the nice
Thing about genes. You know
Where you stand. Your chances.
It doesn't look good for your little
Potato. I predict she will
Either settle, or diet. Neither
is much fun, though both work.
Poor little potato. Can I hold her?
Poor little potato. Never mind.