He Was Slim And His Eyes Were Wrong
by Bobbi Lurie
He was slim and his eyes were wrong.
He was from a species of the creep family, a diagnostician told me as a favor, later, after I was forced to declaw him.
I will say, in my own defense, in the dental angle of a root canal, in my Caramelized, free, buried, air of malnutrition brought on by fishing; by the guts of fish, the mirror through which I saw their fatty, frantic stares at death: glaze-eyed.
The dog smell of the ocean...
Trying to hide, and yet, what continued to permeate was the shiny.
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Author's Note
From Meg Pokrass' prompt
Thanks, Meg
Other stories by Bobbi Lurie
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Great response to the freewrite prompt, Bobbi.
"The dog smell of the ocean..." is a perfect line.
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Nice economy of word.
Like the "fatty, frantic stares at death". Nice one.
Amazing use of the prompt words, with a genuinely strong poetic effect, creep is the word, something very dog here, and also cat, animal, death, sea, brave. *
Now that I discovered Meg's freewrite group, I understand the sudden proliferation of the word "creep."
Well done, Bobbi, but I hate to imagine the dental angle of root canal. Creeps me out, you know?
drawn by the title, and the piece made me (i swear it) read a number of times. goes in all directions at once, this one.
you are welcome! wowza.
Ah, that shininess, that fishiness...permeates magnificently.
I love this, Bobbi! You have used the prompt words so creatively! I admire your imaginative mind so very much.
Fave.
I like this. The shiny permeates from this.
It reads like the verbal equivalent of an Abstract Expressionist painting. Well done.
Love how your work the words!! Beauteous!!! It's exceptional!!
Love how your work the words!! Beauteous!!! It's exceptional!!
Always so original and compelling, and love the title!
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