by Emily Sparkles
An observation that may grow and change over time. A living document of sorts.
This story has no tags.
You set me on fire...until I got to the tag line. *
Good feedback - I was on the fence. Thank you.
Miscue, Miss Sparkles. I liked the tag line. Animals are not dumb, unless you were going for the conventional assumption. But I do pick up "passive" from "doe eyed," as opposed to "sloe eyed."
I hear you. I like the cadence better without the tag line. And I enjoy your perspective on "doe-eyed"'s connotation. Like I said, it's living. It can change and probably will. Who is it that said, "writing is never finished, only good enough?"
I like the cadence better this way, too. With the other it had a sort of "ba da bum" endbeat, which gave it a comic feel.
As to the quote, the nearest I can find is da Vinci's "Art is never finished, only abandoned." Giacometti certainly felt that way.
Good piece. Especially like the opening stanza. *
Thank you, Sam!
I really like the last 3 lines. I think you could expand this.
Thank you, Samuel. I hope to be inspired enough to do so someday soon!