"Leroy!!!"
"What is it ... Mabel??"
"You aren't watching SKIN-E-MAX in there, are you ... ??" (sound of GUFFAWS, coming from the KITCHEN)
"You know I'm not, Mabel!!!"
"Oh, I *do*, do I ... (muttering, sound of DEEP-THROATED gargling coming from the KITCHEN)
"Mabel?? ... What are you *doing*, in there??"
"Nothing!" (sound of a hawked lougie, SPIT) " ... nothing at *ALL*, you see!!!"
"No, I *don't* see -- "
(silence REIGNS, for a BIT)
"Wanna watch 'McNeil-Lehrer NEWS Hour'??"
"Sure!!! Just let me get my CORNS medicine -- "
THE END
"You'll APPLY it, won't you, Leroy??"
(to HIMSELF:) "What a wife!!!" (louder, so she can HEAR IT:) "Yes, DEAR!!!"
"Why thank you, honey!!!"
"Happy VALENTINE'S Day!!!"
"Oh my STARS -- is it ... "
Etc.
(curtain)
This play has been brought to you by OUR *SCHOOLKIDS*, the letter 'R' and the *number* '2'!!!
;)
"STAY *TUNED* -- "
(fade OUT -- )