Hunter, Fate, Food
Turn up your collar
so neck & cheek
become stone against
this mad-dog world
Turn up your collar
so the pointed ends
become wings & you
a flesh-eating hawk
Turn it up
swag-limp down life
like a beast among beasts
unmerciful
Fate circles high above
timing your missteps
& cold-as-fuck breaks
Turn up your collar
luck's no animal
be hunter be taker
knuckles claws &fangs
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Feels like a minor-chord song sung in a very deep voice.
(as in latter Leonard Cohen)
Guttural and threatening. I dig it.
*
Really like this. Every word counts.
Good form, Roberto. I like the rhythms in this -
"swag-limp down life
like a beast among beasts
unmerciful"
Yes--what they said.*
"Turn up your collar / luck's no animal / be hunter be taker"
Applause.
Well done.
*
Whew, some piece. Strong, attacks. Love it, love the bluntness of it. *
This is a tough, muscular piece Roberto- taut and lean and mean, but woven from lovely language and vivid imagery and lyrical phrase. *
good stuff!
This is my new mantra...
Excellent. Every stanza can almost stand alone. Woven together with "turn up, turn up, turn it up, turn up" gives it great tempo.
But, I think my favorite lines are the stand out stanza brilliantly lacking the "turn up" beginning of the other four.
"Fate circles high above, timing your missteps and cold-as-fuck breaks." What great imagery of the impartiality of the universe and how it forces us to adapt to its ruthlessness. And what isn't said is what is implied that despite this mad dog world our humaness can sometimes separate us from the beasts and other times forces us to be like beasts again.