I must say your script is rather impressive.
“You will mesmerize a girl in velvet stained garment…”
“The channels of cologne fade from a body, eventually.”
The girl carousels home with a raspier voice,
The voice of the seasons, her desire for the souvenir.
The Virtues play a new number:
“In motion like language…the soliloquy of the stars.”
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This is very dense, imagistic. I love "carousels home"-- really nice.
Thanks