by bl pawelek
He scribbled on paper with light, or not, writing straight smart lines even when asleep.
The years and decades of massaging letters and mathematics, making them beautiful. Making them ugly.
And the eventuality of desperation. Strange prayers and curses skyward. And madness.
The inward pain and self-affliction, the unhealthiness of obsession and control until the lines burn bright, then normal, then not at all. A complete loss of left sight.
Milton wrote his best lines blind, chasing Shakespeare.
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Too many of my heros have been consumed by their own work.
love when fiction/poetry/prose poetry mixes in the real -- did a little googling/reading after seeing your work and found this --
"In 1651 Milton became blind, but like Jorge Luis Borges centuries later, blindness helped him to stimulate his verbal richness. "He sacrificed his sight, and then he remembered his first desire, that of being a poet," Borges wrote in one of his lectures."
I often struggle with being overly consumed by writing. Maybe that's why I keep thinking I should hang it up for good, just go back to trying to be a father/husband/lawyer.
David. Thanks for the comment!
Milton was my favorite for about a 2-year period. Loved the poor guy.
Yes, mixing history and prose/poetry usually makes my best stuff. Whenever someone asks what I write, I say 'Historical fiction" or something to that end.