Condemned Sentences

by Gary Percesepe

She was just another girl but I slipped on a banana.

Onward to Christian bathrooms and Mormon ports of call.

One day you'll look back on heavy rain and convince yourself those were your tears.

Quash the mind and trump the jetsam.

Llama butter rarely goes on sale so damn the pettifoggery.

He suffered a long time to love for one day.

You can talk to a sweater or pull at your face for hours but a dollar and a wing nut won't cure a Uber.

Go back to sheep we're done with your language.

Hamsters with needles grow suits without zippers.

It happened in deep water.

Ours was a combustible love supplanted by kingpins and head linesmen.

City Hall left even the dog crestfallen but I mounted my pajamas.

The facial committee alas voted no.

Your subtext was deleted, Freud voting with the minority.

Men in underwear live in the mountains.

High school involved meatless meatloaf and wheeling fragility issues.

I'd bet my sandwich money on a swift hit to the neck.

Winners sit on toilets of dubious elevation.

Wide-shouldered total police bodies have pitch perfect jock-itch leadership principles.

Once again you managed to get downwind of my cigar smoke.

As ants circle the drain the people will follow.

The concierge before the big vote choked in a forest of creosote.

Three blizzards ago you lay on your back with your legs in the air, grabbed your ankles and sang Zippity Doo Dah.

We fish in different waters but name the sin and pick a whistle.

Married folk prefer the Whopper.

Blond ticking hair preceded the vote.

The woods are sorry for us as small rain always falls somewhere.

Mr. Bright Side's not worried though his dog opted out of transvaginal.

No titans visited during my days as a wasp.

We parked in an arctic suburb and studied swirling Dutch still life.

Glove compartments are full of unfinished cathedrals.

I'll do the butcher if you'll dance the limoncello.

Shucks, Timmy, we'll never be able to collect all that milk without a saucer.

We are not pizza, beloved.

Take a chance, sue your money.

There was never enough cake in our family.

It was nice being everywhere else.

You seem overegged, North Dakota.

Pile on, the pretty girls, the anxious salads.

We qualified for the wrong purchase.

This is the worst driveway in eastern Connecticut.

Be right back, stay off that leg.

I don't want to have to speak to you again, but can you unblock me?

Ghost that mofo.

It's exhausting being medium.

Her husbands liked her shaved and brisk.

Not to go all agony on you, but cutie pie went bye bye.

The wretched smiles in our area were traced to a legacy god.

She was last seen by a lake, mouthing apologies.

As umbrellas follow rain.

Oops, how was it supposed to look?

We fact checked your pants, America.

Rejigger the door before the nurses get nervous.

We made so much money this poem is on the house.